Liquor, Cheating, & Kurt Godel
by Geek The Girl
Summary: If there's something weird. And it don't look good. Who can ya call' Set post-Damage, with no real spoilers.


Truth is more than logic and computation.   
  
"Darkness. Anger. Whoa, whoever made this box was definitely bitter. Some wicked bad vibes coming off this thing. It's a good thing you called me. I'll need to pick up some materials and then you'll get one professional Wiccan cleansing free of charge." Willow shook her hands, breaking the connection she had made with the artifact. "Well, except for maybe picking up the tab when we go out for drinks tonight. I promise not to drink too much. Just a pitcher or two." She waited for Fred to laugh. "C'mon, it was a joke. Not my best one, but it was worth a laugh."   
  
"Oh, right. I'm sorry, I wasn't paying attention."   
  
"Are you okay? You're being awfully quiet. Is something wrong? Did I do something wrong? Am I talking too much?"   
  
Fred took off her glasses and dropped them into the pocket of her lab coat. Leaning against the end of the examining table, she tried to find the words to explain what she was feeling. "You're being so nice."   
  
"Aren't I always nice? Well, most of the time?"   
  
"It's just- I didn't expect you to come, least of all be so happy to help. After what Andrew said, about us not being on the same side anymore."   
  
"That's caca! You believe that you're doing good here at Wolfram & Hart and I have faith in you and Angel. Buffy and the rest will take that stick out of their asses sooner or later." Willow gave Fred a reassuring smile. "I've got the seat next to Angelus at the 'I tried to destroy the world' banquet, so I can't begin to judge anyone else's actions anyway. Just don't use me as an instrument of black naughty evil."   
  
"Not even if I asked nicely?" Fred teased.   
  
Willow placed her hand lightly on top of Fred's. "I'd definitely give it some thought."   
  
An undecidable statement is one that can neither be proven true nor false ...   
  
French-kissing Willow reminded Fred of the popsicles she used to have when she was a kid. The fruity exterior -- evidence of all the cocktails Willow had been drinking -- giving way to the rough yet smooth texture of the stick. The stick never tasted her back though. She wondered whether the liquor had gone to her head. She was kissing a girl. Oh, it was definitely the liquor. Not that she was going to complain. Charles and Wes had never kissed her like this.   
  
"Are you gals doing alright?" The waitress looked on with the indifference that came with having seen virtually everything. Two women kissing at one of her tables wasn't enough to throw her off her game. "Another round of drinks?"   
  
"Fred?" Willow tried to discreetly wipe a bit of saliva from the corner of her mouth with her thumb.   
  
"The check. Could we just have the check?" After the waitress left, Fred started to giggle. "Alas, kiss called on account of large woman named Bertha."   
  
The universe cannot be vast and self-contained.   
  
"Drink this," Willow encouraged. "It'll help your hangover."   
  
Fred eyed it suspiciously. "What is it? It looks like coffee. Did Harmony make it? Sometimes she forgets to put the milk in."   
  
"I made it and it's not coffee. It's herbal tea of my own special recipe. Trust me on this." She went back to setting up the circle of cleansing, first sanctifying it with sage and then lighting the candles. Turning back to Fred, she noticed that she hadn't touched the cup. "Go on. It's not going to kill you or anything. It'll just clear your mind. I find that when doing magick, a clear head is a definite necessity. Did I ever tell you about the time that I almost got my friends killed because I wasn't thinking clearly?"   
  
"I get your point. Look, I'm drinking it." Fred made a big show of taking the first sip. "Not that bad." Willow gave her a look that just exuded an 'I told you so' attitude. Fred quickly drank the rest and threw the styrofoam cup into the trash. "I'm ready. What do I do?"   
  
"Stand on the other side of the table. I might need to call on your energy when I try to banish this spirit." Once they were both in their places, Willow started to chant. The chanting grew louder and louder until the box seemed to glow with a faintish blue light. "Expello! I banish thee! Expello!"   
  
A low growling sound filled the room. "Expellemus! We beseech thee! Get thee gone from our sight! You are not welcome here."   
  
As quickly as the ritual had begun, it was over. "Is it gone?" Fred asked.   
  
"For the moment. To completely destroy the spirit, the box itself must be destroyed." Willow sat down onto the cold tile, trying to regain her energy. "This is the worst part about being a witch. Banishing spirits takes a lot out of you. I think I need a cookie."   
  
It may be implied that someone or something transcends the universe.   
  
"I had a really nice time, Fred. We should do this more than once a year. I could do without the whole battle with ancient forces, but if that's the only way I can see you-" Willow stared uncomfortably at the lobby floor. She used to have nightmares in high school about moments like this - confessing her feelings for a girl with a Cordette eavesdropping. That Harmony was an undead Cordette who had once tried to kill her didn't make her feel any better. "You could always come down to Brazil for Carnival. I could get the vacation time for you. Angel owes me a favour."   
  
"Maybe you could persuade him to give me a raise too."   
  
Willow laughed, then went quiet as she checked her watch. "I really have to get going. My plane leaves soon. Um, could you tell Spike I said 'hi'?"   
  
"Sure! Wait. You know about Spike?"   
  
"Andrew told me. He was acting odd after he returned to England -- well, more than usual. During a conversation we had over the phone, I sort of threatened him with an extra nose if he didn't tell me what was going on. I figured that it had something to do with Dana but finally he told me that Spike wasn't dead. Well, not dead dead." Willow pushed the strap of her bag back up her shoulder. "I'm sworn to secrecy. Unless Buffy threatens me with bodily harm. Then I'll have to tell her the truth. Lying is bad, which is why I'm going to ask you to step outside."   
  
"Why?"   
  
"Because I have to kiss you again. And when Kennedy asks me what happened at Wolfram & Hart, I'll be able to tell her the truth -- just some demonic cleansing, nothing else."   
  
"Oh. Hey, Harmony. Can you call down to the lab and tell Knox I'll be back in a few minutes?" 


End file.
